Once upon a sheep there was big sheep. And some eggs. But the eggs were boiled already, so they didn’t feature in the big sheep story. We only saw the box that they came in. This sheep was so big that she couldn’t even fit the frame we shot her in. And she was on a mission, we could tell.
Even sitting down it was hard to make sense of her. Her ears were all over the place. Was that meant for hearing? Or can things be purposeless? Just like Bieber?
‘I am fat.’
She spoke! The mouth was for speaking. So perhaps the ears served a function as well and we could talk back?
‘I am so fat I cannot even see my tummy, because if I lean forward, I just tip over.’ Hmm.. the ears probably are for decoration, because she didn’t answer us.
‘Oooooh, eggies! Is it eggies? It’s eggies, isn’t it? Eggies!’
The sheep tried opening the box. We warned her to be careful, or the eggs would fall out. But she didn’t hear. And it wouldn’t have mattered anyway, the box was empty. But the sheep didn’t know that, so we were right giving that warning anyway.
‘Eggies, here I come!’
‘Huh? No eggies?’
‘Or does someone think I am the egg? Someone’s calling me fat again, I can just feel it.’
‘Well, okay then, if I am the egg, I would perfectly fit in this box.’
‘See? Nothing of me left!’
‘Yep, this is a perfect fit.’
‘Or not quite.. am I not an egg, and just fat..’
‘Hey girl, I know that your ears can’t hear, that you are deaf for the truth somehow, and that you only hear what you want. But if anyone should be inside this box, it should be me!’
‘Can you hear me already?’
‘I don’t mind posing with you, little sheep, but it’s weird that you don’t talk..’
‘Why doesn’t big sheep say anything?’
‘Ah, little sheep, I think I understand what you want to do here, you want to sit in the box?’
‘Big sheep, why can’t you hear that it’s me who needs to be boxed?’
‘Hm.. it’s kind of nice to have this silence, I see what you are trying to do here. No words needed.’
‘Please talk to me.’
‘If I hurt you like this, please let me know, if it were just one sound, okay?’
‘Why don’t you press harder? I am way too big for this box, don’t you see that?’
‘I probably shouldn’t mention that little sheep doesn’t quite fit.’
‘Doesn’t nobody see that this was not a good idea?!’
‘Maybe I should press harder.’
‘Maybe you should stop pressing.’
‘Darn, you sure are a fat sheep!’
‘Whut?! NOW you speak to me? Only now? And you’re calling me FAT?!’
Anyone called me?