For me, with her, not now, there were always three day phases.
Awake. Asleep. Alive.
Now most of the time I get two out of three. And just that is either a lie or just not good. Putting whipped cream in my coffee was the best thing I could do after waking up five minutes before the alarm clock did. My body is my best guidance in life. My brain follows or leads. I am her. She guides me this way. She wakes me up at days, you know.. still.
In my dreams then I have these thoughts, there is music playing, maybe it’s something I heard on YouTube (she used to laugh hearing me pronounce that word, she had her own vision on letters and the alfabet..), it had to do with ice, or violins. But what I remember most is the feeling that fell over me, it last the same length as the amount of people that know this story, their eyes filled with the question if they could be the one. Can they? Can she?